GODDAMNIT! I know this is because I was looking at pictures of shit!  I jumped in for a quick shower while Chance was distracted by Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, with the door open as usual so he can wander in and out as needed.  And what does he stroll in with?  A fucking cat turd!  A FRESH cat turd!  In his hands! So of course I’m freaking out (but trying not to scream so I don’t freak him out)… well first I had to lean in REAL CLOSE to see it because I don’t have my glasses on in the shower… AND he’s making those "umm" sounds like when he’s EATING so I was thinking it was a piece of muffin or something… so I grab it, throw it into the toilet, grab him and start washing his hands with antibacterial soap, all the while trying to smell his breath in case he put it in his mouth! Can you feel the multiple layers of freakout here?!  In the meantime, I don’t even know where he got it as the catbox is still safely behind a baby gate so I start running around the house (while toweling myself off) trying to find a pile of steaming cat poop.

I couldn’t find a damn thing.  It must have been a dingleberry that broke free from the cat’s butt.

Usually for the 15 minutes I’m in the shower I’m just freaking out that Chance will fall or hurt himself.

Eww, I still feel ill.