The summer flew by.  And I don't mean that in the usual way where you go, oh wow, where'd the week go? in a general attempt to deflect from the fact that you spent too much of it playing Cleopatra's Pyramid on your tablet and being summertime flaky. I mean as in this summer literally went by faster than any other summer I can remember!!  Short, fast, over.  Some would say, "Hey! That just shows you're living life!"  But I don't feel so much like I'm living as I'm getting sucked through a cosmic time warp like a root beer float through a straw.  And the ice cream chunks are my squishy bits.

I think the universe is speeding up as the punchline to some joke that I'm not going to get until it is much, much too late.  Awkward silence.  Delayed chuckle.

Anywho, school starts next fricking week!  I've decided that for the remainder of summer I will wear short shorts, oversized jewelry, and spray tan (short, fast, over!) as if I jetted off to fabulous sun-shiny locations with lovely shiny people.  I'm sure that will go over well as I uniform shop at Target (navy pants: check; white polo: check; yawn: check).  Because I figure if you blink and accidentally miss summer you might as well fake it like you were awake. 

I bet I can carry that look into September before people start talking.                – wg