I have been in firm and righteous denial for the past few days but… I think I'm getting sick. Or maybe I'm already sick. Denial is so damn dark it's hard to tell. (Like a really smoky club when you're a bit buzzed and you wander into the bathroom but it turns out not to be the bathroom but you've already… um… nevermind.)
Anyway, I hate posting/whining I'm sick. It is winter. Duh. And it's all so terribly banal. (That's a fancy word I learned on Sesame Street. They were starting with the "buh" sound followed by the rest of the word. It didn't end well.) After blogging for 4 1/2 years now I kind of feel like I've done the sick blog thing. I mean, that's so last flu season.
Oh! So I decided to buy a new razor (yeah, I'm talking about razors now) because I've been a disposable girl for years and those have worked fine, but I don't like the idea of filling up the landfills any more than necessary. So I check out all the fancy-schmancy razors (but not the chick ones 'cause they're all pink and shaped weird and seem to be surrounded by vulva. I don't care how moisturizing it may be I'm not shaving with vulva on a stick) and I pick one with the name Mach in it. Like a jet! And how did I not know that the science behind razors had come so far? because, sure enough, this sucker glides across my legs sleek and fast and with nary a nick! It put those disposables to shame. I was so impressed I started making this "br-br-br-br-rrrr" sound as it's flying along, but then I realized I sounded more like a car. So I stopped. Because making car sounds while shaving would be ridiculous.
OK, I just re-read all that and I think my brain is broken.