I go to the dentist every six months like a good girl.  I brush my
teeth with actual toothpaste.  Not so good on the flossing but whatev. 
I do not gargle with caramel… although caramel-flavored toothpaste
would ROCK!  I might bathe in caramel if it was possible.  You know,
like if it was moisturizing.

I have a tooth that has turned black.  A lot of black.  I just
discovered it, trying to floss (floss!) a piece of apple (healthy
snack!) out of my teeth, a little hidden treasure of blackened beauty. 
Not glinting majestically like the cursed gold of a pirate horde.  Not
pearly white like a fair maiden's doubtfully pure necklace.

Can you guess I'm kind of freaked out?

There is no pain.  I was just at the dentist not so long ago.  That
side has been sensitive to cold but they took x-rays and found nothing.

I'm feeling very Medieval right now.  But not in a hot "look what this
corset does to my bosoms!" kind of way.  (Or is that Renaissance?  When
were bosoms invented?)  More like I have scurvy.  Or I should start
sucking at my toothless gums while I cackle dire predictions at young

Of course, I had to show it to Keen.

Keen:  "Eww."
Me:  "Thanks.  So… could this be why I'm so tired?  I've had an infection all summer and didn't know it?"
Keen, man of root canals:  "Um… if you had an infection, trust me, you would have felt it."
Me:  "Even if my root has rotted out or something?" 
Keen:  "They can tell that from the x-rays."
Me:  "Oh."  Obviously my tooth knowledge is vast.

Avast matey!

So I'm going to the dentist today to check it out.  I'd say wish me luck but I'm pretty sure that little gem is lost.

Me:  "Give me a kiss, hon."
Keen:  "Um, no."