I must beg the forgiveness of Stella at Finding Zen (who is a major HOT BABE, by the way). She tasked a few of us to show our drunk faces, and I had thought, “Oh yeah, I’ve got a funny one around here.” But then I LOOKED at it, and it was not so funny, in fact it was HIDEOUS! (OK, it was funny but in a mortifyingly, cringing kind of way.) I know that Stella thought her picture was bad in comparison to her regular Hot Babe self. But let me tell you… her drunk face has got nothing, I mean NOTHING, on mine. It was just too terrifying for words. And as I haven’t even put up a regular picture of myself, I realized I certainly couldn’t start with the drunk photo.
I’m sorry. I am a big chicken.
Like many women, me and photos have never had a great relationship. We started off sweet enough, what with the cute grade school pictures and days at the park. But eventually it got ugly… mainly because that damn camera keeps dumping my ass for younger girls, leaving me looking all ragged and used… or with my mouth open and my eyes all squinty. I know I shouldn’t take it back, but it says it’s sorry and I can’t seem to help myself. I keep hoping it’ll change. Bastard.
Plus, Keen is hesitant about me posting any pictures on the web as he is convinced some crazy stalker will track me down. If I ever get the privilege to meet some of my blogging buddies I’m sure I’ll hear a conversation similar to the one MIM got from Husband.
Anyway, because I do feel like I am totally copping out of my Hot Babe task, here is a verbal description, if any of you (besides Stella) are curious, as to what I look like:
5’2” (“petite” is the nice way of saying “short” – but that’s OK, I make up for it by wearing big heels)
slim (translation = boobies not so large)
short, curly/wavy, red hair
brown eyes and I wear glasses
pretty cute figure, if I may say so myself (thus, Keen’s stalker concern. And no, I’m not down to my pre-pregnancy weight, thanks for asking (smartass).)
hate my nose
not too fond of my skin either (why am I still having breakouts at 34?!)
and… um… pretty good dresser… sometimes…
oh yeah, half Hispanic, half American mix (you know the list, Irish, English, French, etc; I pretty much look white, though)
OK, that’s enough before I sound even more conceited than I normally do. I am hoping Stella, in her infinite grace and wisdom, will forgive my vanity for not obliging her request. (I would send her the picture in private but I’m afraid she will post it. And besides being ridiculously drunk, I was wearing tapered jeans and slouchy socks, for god’s sakes. It just really could not be endured.) – the weirdgirl